XV

So yesterday I went to my fatherchurch, for the first time since a long long time. Besides a few details which have been changed in the building itself, I didn't notice anything special, maybe just a few new faces.

Actually I don't like masses for it's unchangeable pattern. The only part of it I'm truly interested in are the readings and teaching. We read a passage from Jeremiah telling about times when the prophet was ridiculed and mocked because of his faith. But this frament taught me that it is just one of the aims on my spiritual way - to stand still even if I stumble, to carry my cross and to know the consequences of being a child of God. Not always happy consequences. What would I call my own cross? Probably all things which I struggle with, which make my day not exactly what I would like them to look like. I could enumerate them here and it would probably take more than an hour. Anyway, I want to carry this cross, yes, I'm aware of what I'm saying, I want to do it because I feel this relationship with Jesus and I confess He is my friend, so how could I leave my friend and let Him carry the cross alone? Because of this cross I am saved, no other way. So I want to accomplish my daily tasks even if they are not easy, I want to fight my weaknesses and I want to prove myself and to prove the world that with Jesus help this cross is lighter, I can handle it.

If you really put your faith in God there's nothing that can pull you down, because you will always find your strength in Him. Do not bother about earthly matters but trust Him, because He cares for you and will not let you be torn apart from Him. He cares about you coming to His kingdom starting your way there here on Earth. That is soooo building up!